Making Peace

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Finally, starting to feel calmer and comfortable in my surroundings. It has been a month since I moved out of my home. I try to share what is positive, but just writing out my feelings today. This has been the most challenging, disruptive, and discouraging part of my life. To say this is easy would be a complete and total lie. But, it was and is unquestionably, totally and positively necessary. I am comparing it to going to the dentist and getting a very painful tooth extracted. But, most of all no matter what life brings us, we have to do our best to rise above it all. And, most of all being kind to ourselves is most important. The wierdest feeling is the guilt, when I haven't done anything wrong. The other worst feeling I have is the feeling of being a failure and oh so shameful. So, today is the first day I don't have anything really important to deal with. So, I am looking forward to creating something. That always makes me feel successful, positive and purposeful. I think the best thing for me this month was waking early enough to enjoy the sunrise. It brings this surprising excitement to my morning. It only lasts for a few minutes, and it is challenging to capture the reflections and colors. The other amazing part of it is the experience. A photo or a video can not captures the true magnificance of the changes happening second by second right before my eyes. So, day by day I am making strides to capture peace and bring it to my total being. I am living in a small apartment and decorated is is in a french theme! I have always loved the feeling of being in France (without the long flight and jet lag). I love it! And, the picture I am sharing is above my dining table. After going to Paris I couldn't really understand why they called it the City of Lights. I thought it was pretty grey and bland. But, I guess that is why it is called that because of the eiffel tower etc. So, I feel the same way, that during this time of darkness and turbulence I am really appreciating the light of day each morning. Quote of the day: "It's on the stregnth of observation and reflection that one finds a way. So we must dig and delve unceasingly" Claude Monet Song of the Day: The Rising by Bruce Springsteen

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